We are all living a life from morning till night, where we face situations where anger is a common and most easiest response we choose. Once a doctor was meeting a patient in his clinic and asked her that how many times do you become angry in a day? She replied that I have never counted but I think not a single day passes when I do not get angry and loose my temper at my husband and my children and the maid and even the shopkeeper. The doctor replied that have you ever wondered what goes on inside you after every bout of anger? Every second of anger or anger related emotions causes the secretion of negative chemicals and negative hormones inside the body. This is constantly harming the body and causes severe psychosomatic illnesses or illnesses caused by a negative mind, like blood pressure, diabetes, depression, insomnia and even cancer in the body. Also, the positive mood of peace, love and happiness inside our minds, can remain low for many hours, after even a smallest bout of hatred, revenge, aggression and any other toxic and negative behavior. We give you 5 keys to overcome anger in this message:
1. Don’t Try To Change What You Can’t Change – Very often we try and change scenes in our life, which are beyond our control. Scenes of life including different situations and behaviors of people, which are not as per our desire, make us react negatively and with emotions full of anger. When we cannot change a scene, we feel frustrated and feel things are out of our control. At that point of time, remind yourself that everything cannot go our way and as per our desires in life always. Also, the more we bring about positive change in ourselves, the more the energy of our change will change scenes around us in a positive way. So, instead of wanting that a particular person have a particular quality or a particular situation be more positive, fill yourself with that quality or that positivity and radiate it to your surroundings. This way you will accept and not expect, because expectations are the seed of all anger filled emotions.
2. I Am A Source Of Infinite Peace And Love – Always Remember That – We are all a beautiful source of peace and love, which we can experience all the time and share with others. Also, where there is peace and love, the power to tolerate different types of people and situations is there inside us, which makes it easy for us to remain calm and patient, instead of reacting violently. Hating someone and speaking against someone behind their backs or in front of them is all a reflection of lack of the sweet peace and love which we are full of eternally, but we forget that. Start your day with the following affirmation: I am a being of light, a soul full of peace and love. I visualize my spiritual form, a sparkling star at the centre of the forehead. I radiate this light of sweetness to the world. Repeat this affirmation to yourself many times in a day and slowly the personality of creating angry and violent responses will be changed to sweeter and more humble responses to people and situations.
3. Forgive And Forget – Have you ever spent complete day thinking about another person’s negative actions and giving it different forms in your mind, all of which are not only negative but hurt you internally. Such hurt carried in your heart can become a source of anger at every step and make your mind violent. This type of carried anger can spill out in different situations involving you and other people and not necessarily the person who is the cause of the anger. To forgive and forget requires emotional strength. To respond with love and not react with anger is forgiveness in action. To forgive is to love unconditionally. To forget is to bring benefit to the self, because violence in the mind harms the mind, body and relationships immensely. Only when you forgive, can you forget. To forgive, remember everyone’s original personality is one of sweetness, peace and love and a negative comment or an action of bitterness by someone is a result of an acquired negative sanskara, which is temporary and which the other person is trying to remove.
4. Let Go Of The I Am Right Consciousness – One of the most significant causes of anger filled relationships is the ego that I am right and the other person is wrong. The more the ego, the more the anger. Very often people who are very moody in the family or at the workplace and are always shouting at other people and seeing them as incorrect are the ones who are very egoistic. Also, a very common and negative shade of anger is sarcasm – to comment sarcastically on people’s actions and to always think that what I think and do is the best and only right. On the other hand, the one who sacrifices his or her ego will be very sweet and merciful in interactions, even if the other person has genuinely committed some mistakes. To see others as innocent and not to be over-critical, a very simple practice is to see atleast one specialty in each and every person we meet everyday. This type of positive vision makes us free from anger and even in the most negative of situations we see people positively and not focus on their faults and weaknesses.
5. Remain Stress Free To Become Anger Free – Life is full of many different types of negative situations and twists and turns, which keep us unsettled and stressed at times. Stress is primarily caused by too many whys, whats, whens and hows, which are questions in our minds. The more the mind is full of questions and unsolved problems, the more the mind will react in the form of toxic words and actions. Problems will always exist but our attachment to them and impatience in waiting for them to get solved at the right time and in the right manner leads to anger. Anger in many cases is just a form of bottled up stress, which bursts open from time to time. Meditation and positive thinking as a result of the practice of meditation are some common techniques to resolve stress of the mind. Freedom from anger follows freedom from stress.