We are basically unlimited beings. But we limit ourselves in many comfort zones. We have a lot of conditioning’s which, in reality, are mental.
Some mosquitoes were put in a box and they kept jumping a lot. The box was covered from the top and each time they jumped they hit the top of the box, and when they jumped too close to the right or the left they hit the sides of the box. Slowly, to avoid harming themselves, they learned to jump just under the cover and without reaching the sides of the box. One day all the four sides of the box were opened. The mosquitoes were free, but they kept on jumping as far as the limit they had learned. The physical limits were no longer there. But they had become conditioned mentally. The same thing happens to us. We have to open the sides of the box and take off the top, or we can continue to live inside the box created by our own mind.
Given below are some conditioning’s under which we work, because of which we do not experience complete freedom.
– Beliefs, acquired since our childhood, which limit us.
– The negative images of low self esteem that we have created of ourselves.
– The damaging thoughts of doubt, which does not let the highway of trust to build up inside ourselves and does not allow the creative energy of positivity to flow from inside us to the outside.
– The fear of failure or not being to able to succeed completely. A lot of times the fear exists due to past experiences of failure or not having succeeded as much as you would have liked.
We need to become aware of what our pattern of thoughts is, which brings us under the negative influence of mental conditioning’s. When that happens, we will be able to become free of these conditioning’s. While we do not become aware, we will continue to remain under its influence.
The human being is psychosomatic by nature – what that means is that our health is deeply influenced by our behavior, thoughts, emotions and social relationships. Therefore, in order to experience good health, we should care for our life style, our mental, sentimental, emotional and relational world, as well as our communication. Fear is bad for our health. It manifests itself in the form of anger and promotes coronary diseases. Fear suppressed for a long time ends up producing diseases such as cancer. Apart from cancer and heart attacks, there are other illnesses brought on by fear: addictions, anxiety, arthritis, asthma, irritability, nervous breakdowns, memory loss, gastritis, back pains, baldness, diarrhea, sciatica, crying attacks, alcoholism, constipation, hypertension, cystitis (bladder inflammation), vomiting, palpitations, digestive disorders, ulcers and migraines.
When we get old, our neurons do not die, but rather the connections between them disappear, that is what recent scientific research suggests. The neuronal connections or synapses keep us lively and young. When we have pleasant experiences, such as during meditation or when we are on a holiday or are surrounded by friends or while working in a team, some examples of activities in which we feel happy, the neuronal connections are more fluid. However, the lights go out when we feel fear. It is an emotion that is capable of slowing down and blocking the electrical impulses between the neurons. With fear we are less creative and we get older more quickly. If we do not want to suffer illnesses (or want our illnesses to get worse) we should learn to manage and overcome fear.
Mother, what are you making for dinner tonight? Do make something delicious! The ordering children often dictate the menu for a meal to their mothers, hoping for a mouthful. Mothers are often in a hurry to finish their cooking tasks for the day and also eager to fulfill the tastes of their children and other family associates. Often mothers relax at the end of the day after having spent their energies on the minutest details of their meals – the vegetables, the salt, the turmeric, the spices, the oil, the pulses, the wheat flour and the water – taking care that food is prepared precisely, leaving no room for error. The objective – satisfying the palate of everyone and also earning the blessings from the family expressed in the form of many – yummies, wows, lovelies and thank yous. How come, inspite of this warm exterior feel to this family setting, there lie underneath not so warm subtle energies, which prevent the food from being not only pleasing to the tongue and stomach, but also spiritually fulfilling.
Love filled food, pure vibrational energy filled food is not only healthy, curing ailments but also spiritually, emotionally and mentally soothing, because of the subtle bridges that exist between the body and the non-physical mind causing both of them to influence each other. You have heard of how food cooked by a mother tastes better than the food cooked by a maid. Why? Because of the purity of purpose. The mother is absorbed in the love of her children while working on the meals and the maid cooks because she earns from the task, which she experiences as tedious many times. The mother will cook with a higher purpose which reflects in the food quality and the energy it’s every morsel (bite) carries invisibly. So food should be cooked in love, but let’s change this to a higher love, say a higher love for God and not the worldly love which carries with it dependencies, attachments, possessiveness and fear.
When cooking a meal, switch on the role of a beautiful creator of the divine sustenance for the mind and body, a loving God Mother and switch off the role of a hard-working homemaker, say to yourself – I love making a meal using the creations of nature, the ingredients that are given to me by the wonders of nature, the elements of nature, so pure in their original state, that they are also given the status of different Gods or deities actually (although being non-living), like Vayu Devta (the god of wind), Surya Devta (the sun god), Indra Devta (the rain god), Agni Devta (the god of fire), Prithvi Devta (the earth god) etc. Nature is also commonly called Mother Nature or Dharti Mata, which reflects its purity, gentleness and softness. These elements reflect all that nature has to offer us through different sources.
So making a meal is respecting and loving these elements to the fullest. Also, although nature’s elements are eternal, it is important to know that when nature loses its sanctity (purity), it’s the Supreme Power of the Universe, incorporeal (non-physical) God who purifies them and returns them to their original state. That is why God is mistakenly called the creator of nature, which he is not per se (exactly), although he is a transformer of nature. So the nature’s elements also, when in their pure state, giving pure energy to the soul and its temple, the physical body. But, today as we all know, these elements have lost their purity on a physical level i.e. because of causes like pollution, emission of poisonous gases from manufacturing units, deforestation, depletion of the ozone layer, global warming and other man created issues like the use of improper materials to grow vegetables and fruits that are harmful to the physical body; and they have also deteriorated on a subtle energy level, the spiritual energy level. So it’s important to purify your meal ingredients through meditation before their consumption.
The low subtle energy of certain foods like meat, fish, chicken, eggs, onions, garlic, etc. and also alcohol is a deterrent in the purification of the soul, which is carried out by any wise person as a life objective and they also affect the body negatively on an energy level although you might vouch for their physical benefits, which may even be correct. So excessive consumption of such foods should be avoided, in fact completely avoided. This is a spiritual principle and given significance by the spiritual minded, based on their experiences, because these foods cause the minds to become agitated and lustful, even subservient (under the influence of) to other negative emotions like greed, attachment, ego and jealousy. On a lighter note, you might say, then why not purify these foods by meditation and then consume them but these are foods that come in the tamsic category and giving them pure emotional energies in the form of subtle vibrations does not transform their inherent tamsic or impure nature so much so as to not have a negative effect on the mind and the body.
Also, along with being selective about your meal menu ingredients, taking into consideration their different natures, it’s important to maintain a higher spiritual consciousness while cooking and having meals. This can be done by mothers by creating positive and peaceful thoughts or by playing a few songs of the spiritual type or even playing soothing meditation tunes which performing the cooking karma. Also, before consuming any food item or even water, spend a few seconds in creating a powerful thought of spiritual self-respect and focus your vision or drishti on the item. In this way, the food or liquid item will be charged with positive vibrations through your eyes and its negative nature, both on a physical as well as spiritual level, will be healed. This is in short a spiritual perspective of cooking and consumption of meals and the intention of the message is not to prevent you from having tasty meals and delicious dishes which you are addicted to.
In relationships with your loved ones, when looking at the other, sometimes positive emotions are generated and sometimes negative. On the one hand, joy, love and happiness is generated on being with them; but then attachment, dependency and expectations are generated. In such situations, you are more focused on others and are always looking at the other person’s behavior, you stop seeing yourself and being aware of your reactions and taking the responsibility for the responses that you create. You get frustrated when the other person does not meet your expectations. As you depend on them, if they don’t act as you would like, if they don’t reach home or call you at the time you would like; all this frustrates you. You radiate this energy to the other: “they are not doing what they should be doing,” and so you feel frustrated and discontented. All the while that you hold the other one responsible for your frustration, you are not in charge of your own reactions, because you have given power to the other to dominate your emotional world. It is there that you lose your freedom. You lose your freedom because you give to the other, in the name of love, power over your own moods. You allow the other’s energy to enter your inner world and cause inside you frustration, bad moods, irritation, sorrow and a mental and emotional dependence where you are constantly thinking about where they are, what they have to do, what they have to say, where they have to go, and all this consumes a lot of your mental energy. Wanting to control the other and the frustration that it brings with it uses up a lot of emotional energy.
Relationships can be defined on the surface as a state in which two or more people are connected, the state of being related or interrelated or if the definition is expanded, the way in which two people, talk to, regard and behave towards each other, and deal with each other. Spirituality sees relationships from a deeper perspective – “relationships are not only what we do or say to each other, but are built on the basis of what we think about each other”. So relationships, when seen from a spiritual view point, are an exchange of energy at the level of thoughts and feelings, and then words and actions thereafter.
Relationships are one of the most important wealth of our lives and one of the most important sources of our happiness. In order to make them successful i.e. to create the wealth of positive relationships and to experience joy through them continuously, it is important to base them on the right belief systems. One major incorrect belief that we carry inside ourselves with regards to our relationships is that relationships are all about behaving and talking in the right manner, because we think people see, know and judge only what we speak and do, they do not sense what we think, and so we don’t give enough significance to our thoughts. But thoughts are more in number and being a more powerful and subtle energy, travel faster than words. When we interact with someone let us take care that along with the right action our thoughts are also right. If we have negative thoughts containing any type of impurity of hatred, greed, jealousy, resentment, selfishness, ego, etc. and we perform pure actions filled with the energy of virtues, neither will we be internally content nor will we be able to satisfy the other person. In all our relationships, it is the intention, the packets of thought energy or vibrations that we transmit, which matter more than the action. Giving significance to the inner intentions while coming into relationships is true transparency in relationships. Performing right actions packaged with thoughts which are colored with negative emotions, will only transmit pain to the other on a subtle level, even though we did it for their happiness.
Husband-wife relationships, sometimes, are like castles of sand, extremely pleasing to the eye, but based on weak foundations and susceptible to destruction when challenged by negative tides of clash of opinions, personalities or lifestyles. In such relationships, the castles look good from outside because of energies like acceptance, trust, understanding and ‘letting go’ existing on the surface i.e. these energies are displayed by both partners to each other in the form of words, gestures and actions but these castles can easily collapse because the foundations of these castles i.e. thoughts and feelings carried by the partners in their minds are filled with expectations, rejection, mistrust, misunderstandings, possessiveness and suspicion at times along with the positive emotions which are displayed in actions. Also both partners feel they have made their respective positive contributions in the relationship and so the same is expected from the other side, which is not fulfilled at times, further increasing the problems in the relationship. At the same time both partners are oblivious (not aware) of the negative emotional, much more powerful forces that exist inside them, which go against the positive contribution and are silently working on the castle of the relationship from below, ready to bring it down anytime.
Another e.g. – in corporate circles, apart from the external objective of profit making and generation of revenue and jobs, an important internal objective of any good corporate organization is creating a peace, love and happiness filled as well as obstacle free atmosphere in the company, which will be conducive (helpful) to the external objective. One spiritual principle states that the leader or CEO or Managing Director of the organization is like a seed of the organization, whose every thought reaches out to and influences every person of the organization as well as the organization as a whole. A second spiritual principle states that the internal ruling and controlling power of a leader of an organization is directly proportional to the handling (of the people of the organization) power of the leader. If in the inner confines (boundaries) of the leader’s mind, obstacles of waste and negative thoughts exist i.e. the inner atmosphere of the leader’s mind is not full of peace, love and joy, then as per the first spiritual principle, this gets transmitted to the people under the leader and as per the second spiritual principle, such a leader who is lacking in mind ruling power and mind controlling power is automatically lacking in handling power of people under him. Such a leader, due to the application of both these principles, is ineffective in creating a positive environment in the organization.
Parent-child relationships are the foundation of our complete life. The earliest habits that children acquire in their lives are from their parents. Very often parents try and impose positive habits on their children. A very common trend that we see nowadays where parents will scold their child for common negative actions like getting angry, for lying to them, for watching inappropriate stuff on different mediums of technology like television and the internet or for getting involved in relationships with the opposite gender at a young age. Very commonly parents are not satisfied with the change brought about by children by following the rules that they have set for them, causing parent-child relationships to get strained. Why is it that inspite of children knowing that parents are concerned for them, do not pay heed to their instructions and continue with the negative habits? A more powerful medium than words, which reaches children on a physical level, is the personality radiation of the parents which works on children and reaches them faster than and much before the words do. Parents dictate the change but don’t be the change i.e. similar habits of lust, anger, ego, greed, etc. exist inside them which keep traveling to the children on a subtle energy level and impacting (influencing) their minds negatively much sooner than positive words in the form of instructions, leaving the words as good as ineffective.
Also considering another common relationship that children have, the one with their school teachers; many investigations confirm that teachers’ expectations, whether negative or positive, form one of the most influential factors in the academic performance of their students. If teachers expect good results from their students and have complete faith and confidence that they will succeed, their performance will be much closer to their real capacity than if they are expecting poor results. Very often in schools, the teachers’ words regarding the performance of the children are not a direct reflection of their thoughts i.e. words are full of faith and hope in the students’ success but thoughts are lacking in optimism with regards to the same. Negative thoughts of fear of probable failure of the children, in the minds of teachers, in-spite of positive words of encouragement, negatively impact impressionable minds of children leading to their poor show in school exams.
Vibrations are much stronger than our wordings. If we have good thoughts for anyone but by mistake we say something wrong, relationship will be strong and smooth but if we have negative thoughts for anyone and we try to become loving, caring & try to show good relationship with that personality but actually relationship is not strong and it is from upper end only.
It’s worth wondering, what I need to change inside my belief system so that no feelings of revenge exist inside me for anyone irrespective of what someone has done to me. When someone harms me or insults me in any way, what is the belief that exists inside my inherent belief system that causes feelings of revenge to emerge inside me in the first place? It is the belief that – whenever someone does something negative to me, he hurts me, he is the victimizer and I am a victim. I need to change that to – no one can never hurt me, but it’s what I do with someone’s negative actions, what shape I give the negative actions inside my mind, that causes me hurt, the choice lies with me.
Two people will do two different things inside their minds with the offensive or negative actions of a particular person – one will create feelings of anger, hatred, sorrow, etc which will give rise to the desire for revenge; the other will create feelings of peace, love and good wishes which will give rise to only forgiveness, with no room for revenge. In other words, two different people will respond in two different ways to the negativity of the so called victimizer, depending on their belief system, their inherent personality or nature, their experience of similar negative actions in the past, either committed by the same person or by other people. All these factors will shape their perception of the others actions and the self. One will see the other or perceive the other as the victimizer and himself as a victim and another will not identify the other person with his negative actions, but will instead focus on his inherent positive nature or positive aspects of his current personality and will also remain unaffected himself.
The urge for revenge and the false taste of victory or happiness related to it can only end when the belief, that others are responsible for what you feel, is seen as a false one. Only when you take full responsibility for whatever thoughts and feelings you create will it be possible to end the anger and the hatred that seeks revenge. When someone hurts me, I create a negative image of myself and the other person in my mind’s eye, in different ways. I see myself and the other in a negative light, myself as a victim and the other person as a victimizer. I need to stop doing that and see myself and the other in a positive light, in the same light as before, irrespective of the negativity that the other has radiated to me. When we do that, we will stop pointing the finger at others for whatever hurt we may feel. Only when it is fully seen and accepted that someone can hurt or harm my vehicle, the physical body, but not me, the controller or driver of the vehicle, will rage and the desire for revenge stop existing inside my consciousness.
When I start seeing the person who has committed some negative action which is projected towards me, with an innocent, unbiased, untarnished vision, hatred will be transformed into love and compassion for both, me and the other person. Then it will be possible to be totally free of all judgment, criticism and any desire to seek justice and take pleasure and experience victory when justice is delivered. Only then will it be possible to rediscover true happiness in life, because as long as there is even the slightest trace of an urge to seek revenge for what someone has done to me, and the desire to experience the false happiness which is experienced when such revenge is delivered; both of which, the happiness and the revenge, are forms of subtle violence; true everlasting and deep peace, contentment and happiness can never be experienced.
Worry is a process of imagining the worst possible outcome or result or future in a particular situation and creating a living and active image of it in front of the eye of your mind, and then using the energy of that negative image to flow inside your consciousness so as to completely overpower or weaken your spiritual and as a result your physical self to evoke fear in the self.
When people are asked about this process, a person who is attached to this process and is involved in the process very regularly the whole day in different types of situations, one who is a habitual worrier, responds “But it’s important to worry, it’s good to worry. If we don’t think of different possible negative outcomes, how will we prepare for them?” It’s important to realize that the belief, that by worrying, we prepare for the worst in the future is a false one. This belief causes us not to realize the truth that all worry is simply an incorrect and fruitless creation. It is a wrong use of the positive, constructive and imaginative capacity of our mind and intellect which, instead of empowering the mind and intellect, weakens it.
Preparing for the future is important and necessary, but very often while doing that, we enter the territory of worry, which leaves us, defeated or weakened. There is an extremely fine line between proactive preparation (necessary preparation in advance) on the one hand and worry on the other. The preparation can be done without creating an excessive number of possible negative outcomes in the mind.
On the other hand, imagining possible positive outcomes or results will have a double effect of not only keeping the negative outcomes away from us (even if there is a possibility of them occurring), but will also attract the positive results towards us. But to ensure that both these processes happen, it’s important not to attach possible negative results to the same, even to the minutest extent, otherwise the probability of positive futures becoming a reality reduces. Worrying is another word for this attachment process.
Worry is a type of mental habit, which arises from the belief that it’s good to worry. This belief gets acquired during our childhood. And then it keeps getting strengthened from our life experiences. We start from this belief. That attracts negative circumstances; as a result the belief gets strengthened further, because you think that with life full of so many negative circumstances, it’s important to think of negative outcomes beforehand. You don’t realize that these negative situations occurred in the first place largely due to this belief. When we are faced with a negative situation, again we worry because we hold that belief. Again it’s the same result. In this way, we are caught in a vicious cycle. How do we come out of this cycle? By changing this belief to – ‘it’s not good to worry’. Once we do that, there is no guarantee that negative situations will completely stop arising in our life, because we have performed negative actions in the past (either in this birth or past births), which need to be settled in our present, but the extent of negative situations will be minimized. And even if they do come, they will bid goodbye sooner, if we have a worry-free consciousness.