It’s worth wondering, what I need to change inside my belief system so that no feelings of revenge exist inside me for anyone irrespective of what someone has done to me. When someone harms me or insults me in any way, what is the belief that exists inside my inherent belief system that causes feelings of revenge to emerge inside me in the first place? It is the belief that – whenever someone does something negative to me, he hurts me, he is the victimizer and I am a victim. I need to change that to – no one can never hurt me, but it’s what I do with someone’s negative actions, what shape I give the negative actions inside my mind, that causes me hurt, the choice lies with me.
Two people will do two different things inside their minds with the offensive or negative actions of a particular person – one will create feelings of anger, hatred, sorrow, etc which will give rise to the desire for revenge; the other will create feelings of peace, love and good wishes which will give rise to only forgiveness, with no room for revenge. In other words, two different people will respond in two different ways to the negativity of the so called victimizer, depending on their belief system, their inherent personality or nature, their experience of similar negative actions in the past, either committed by the same person or by other people. All these factors will shape their perception of the others actions and the self. One will see the other or perceive the other as the victimizer and himself as a victim and another will not identify the other person with his negative actions, but will instead focus on his inherent positive nature or positive aspects of his current personality and will also remain unaffected himself.
The urge for revenge and the false taste of victory or happiness related to it can only end when the belief, that others are responsible for what you feel, is seen as a false one. Only when you take full responsibility for whatever thoughts and feelings you create will it be possible to end the anger and the hatred that seeks revenge. When someone hurts me, I create a negative image of myself and the other person in my mind’s eye, in different ways. I see myself and the other in a negative light, myself as a victim and the other person as a victimizer. I need to stop doing that and see myself and the other in a positive light, in the same light as before, irrespective of the negativity that the other has radiated to me. When we do that, we will stop pointing the finger at others for whatever hurt we may feel. Only when it is fully seen and accepted that someone can hurt or harm my vehicle, the physical body, but not me, the controller or driver of the vehicle, will rage and the desire for revenge stop existing inside my consciousness.
When I start seeing the person who has committed some negative action which is projected towards me, with an innocent, unbiased, untarnished vision, hatred will be transformed into love and compassion for both, me and the other person. Then it will be possible to be totally free of all judgment, criticism and any desire to seek justice and take pleasure and experience victory when justice is delivered. Only then will it be possible to rediscover true happiness in life, because as long as there is even the slightest trace of an urge to seek revenge for what someone has done to me, and the desire to experience the false happiness which is experienced when such revenge is delivered; both of which, the happiness and the revenge, are forms of subtle violence; true everlasting and deep peace, contentment and happiness can never be experienced.